Wednesday, February 28, 2018

What a mess. Or is it?

I keep my blog for my friends and family. I keep it for me.  I also keep it because I feel that maybe, just maybe it will be a help or encouragement someone along their way- be it friend or stranger.

I opened my heart and life to you four times over the past two months.  I did it because I felt that I had to, had to share...I think that God was leading me to.  I was not looking for pity or accolades or lectures. (At the very least NOT from perfect strangers. People who don't know or like me at all.) 

I have to admit that I was surprised/found it funny/shocked/hurt to find a thread on a dumb forum had been created just to discuss/make fun of my life, blog, family, etc....I know that these kinds of forums are often created and commented on by sad and hurting people. 

Positive thoughts:
~I did receive some sweet/nicer comments...a few people I actually thought that we could maybe like each other if we met in real life.
~I always wished that I had a slightly larger blog audience, now I have it: I have had a huge boost in numbers of folks visiting my blog (over 500!).
I pray that someone is blessed by my posts.  I pray that God will soften hearts, and that people will realize that each one of us is unique and has a different life story.

That said, I'd like to address a few of the things people seem to be "worried" about: 

~Yes, I depend on my Mom, and she depends on me. I depend on my Dad too, for that matter. We ALL depend on someone- sibling, partner, boss, roommate, friend, co-worker, etc.

~I'm not opposed to dating, in that if I knew I liked and trusted a guy enough, I'd go out with him.

~I DO have guy friends. I like guy friends. I had brothers, male cousins, and in my Sunday school, I was the only girl (nice), for 4(?)years!  It's just that I have to know someone a while before I feel comfortable enough to consider them friends, let alone family. (My highest praise of you would be for you to land a honoree relative title.)

~I don't have the happy knack of making any kind of friends- I find it very hard to find subjects of common interest, and the right questions to draw people out.

~Am I a perfect "Stay at Home Daughter"?  No, not me...just ask around.

~I don't "dwell on marriage"- If the recent number of posts suggest that, not true- I've just been writing as I feel led, hoping to be honest and maybe encourage some other life traveler.

~In my circle the number of "singles over 30" is less than a handful.

~I believe in the sovereignty of God- His plans for my life and ordering the universe.
Proverbs 21:31 "The horse is prepared for the day of battle, but the victory belongs to the LORD." Man proposes, but God disposes.  I do what I can with the life God has given me, and results are up to God.

~Sure Jane Austin wrote fiction, but there are no book/movie/play characters who don't have some truth- every character is based in some way on one or more person in real life.  Why else do movies tend to have disclaimers? 

~We don't have strange political views.  And we are not neo-cons.

~I/my family are NOT Fundamentalists. We aren't average Evangelicals.  (Reformed people & Presbyterians are not your average cup of tea.)

~We do not consider ourselves "amateur" soap makers.  Mom and I started making soap in 1997, and have been selling our soap since the early 2000's.  And Colloidal Silver is silver in water. It is not damaged by heat. Our soap is labeled properly- we believe that all products should have all ingredients listed.  How else can one make an informed decision to buy them or not?


Ellie said...

I've been following your blog for awhile now after accidentally finding it when looking at sewing tutorials. I'm a stranger, Who's not dissimilar to you(Homeschooled-homemaker). I never saw your post as being desperate or ignorant of interpersonal relationships, Just simply things in life happen and you were honest enough to say it. All I'm saying is be yourself because nobody really knows what you fully mean in relation to everything that has happened to you, If anything judging from a few post is ridiculously close minded. I do believe they are plans for you, I'm not particularly religions but things always happen you can't predict, That's happened to me. I'm not great at social things, but I accidentally ran into someone amazing. So keep it up Adirenne, I'm on your side even if we barely know of each others existence.

Anonymous said...

Dear Adrienne:

You seem like a lovely young woman who enjoys life. Don't let anyone make you feel less than you are. We live in a time when people are far too critical of others, especially from behind their anonymous keyboards.

I am much older than you, and have a much loved 20 year old daughter who is a wonderful influence on everyone she meets.
I wouldn't want her to change her standards, values, and dreams for any other person. I understand from my own experience how proud your own mom is of you. As my high school students say, "You do you."

I married my husband when I was 36 years old after many years of listening to family and friends tell me that I was too "picky". We were lucky to have our daughter a few years later. Many friends who were critical of my choices now see how happy my life has been because I waited for the right person and did things at my own pace.

Life is full of wonderful and different opportunities. Take advantage of the ones that mean the most to you. Keep enjoying your life and the ones you love -


Adrienne said...

Dear Ellie & Caroline,
Thank you SO much for for kind, wise words! They mean a great deal to me. =)

sharon hunter said...

Thanking God for the wonderful friend you are, Adrienne. I agree with you that those passing judgement are responding from the hurts of life. Pain is hard to endure, but brings growth with healing.
Keep your heart and mind focused on Him.

Adrienne said...

Thank you, Mrs. Hunter!

Anonymous said...

Oh, dear, my heart goes out to you! I believe some of the members of the forum you discuss may have positive intentions. But for the most part it’s a cesspool of negativity and bullying. Ignore those silly people is my advice; how kind and thoughtful your reply is. Bless you!